I've cooked up a conspiracy theory that explains what happened to the Broncos, and while I concede I'm making this story up, I'm not sure it's any more ridiculous than what has actually transpired.
In the next installment, Pete reports the results of the meeting to Jody Allen in the Fortress of Solitude her brother built, where she oversees his empire while stroking a white cat.
"By the way," Pete asks, "any progress on getting that time portal in the North Endzone to work?"
"No," Jody sighs. "It's buggy. I told Paul not to try it, but he saw that Doctor Who episode and, well..."
I just read (I got sidetracked by the link to your shotgun article) your "Fan fiction: Pete Carroll's 'Mole' undoes…" post.
It's hilarious. :)
It also had information that I was unaware of, and you provided links. My favorite link showed the lifted (heh) urban assault pickup for a short (for an NFL quarterback) person (5' 10 5/8" before age-related shrinkage).
I clicked on the link that you posted for your "My Father’s Gun: Coming to Terms With a Controversial Weapon" column in Seattle Magazine, then I read the entire column. Then I re-read your Author's note for this Substack article/post: "Do not continue if you’re looking for anything that resembles journalism or you lack a sense of humor."
I decided that I did not fit the criteria for not continuing.
I liked your "My Father's Gun" Seattle Magazine column. You seem to be ambivalent (or at least the article gave me that impression) regarding guns. At the risk of being perceived as banging a drum: the first amendment to our republic of states' Constitution regards freedom of speech, and the second amendment regards gun rights. Please consider the significance of the juxtaposition of those first two amendments.
I hope that the following observations/memories (I grew up hunting/fishing) will help to provide more background/context regarding your father (not your stepfather).
1) BB guns can do significant property damage (windows) and even lifelong physical damage ("That'll put your eye out!").
2) BB guns are difficult for parents to monitor/supervise because they are quiet, inexpensive, and the ammunition (a BB) is so inexpensive as to be almost free.
3) As far as I know, geese hunting is done using 10 gauge or even 8 gauge shotguns because geese are flying at higher altitudes than ducks when hunted (I don't know why). A 12 gauge shotgun would have too much recoil for most 13 year old boys. A 10 gauge (the next larger bore) shotgun would have a more punishing recoil than a 12 gauge shotgun, and an 8 gauge shotgun has a larger bore (and more punishing recoil) than a 10 gauge shotgun.
In the next installment, Pete reports the results of the meeting to Jody Allen in the Fortress of Solitude her brother built, where she oversees his empire while stroking a white cat.
"By the way," Pete asks, "any progress on getting that time portal in the North Endzone to work?"
"No," Jody sighs. "It's buggy. I told Paul not to try it, but he saw that Doctor Who episode and, well..."
My face hurts from smiling. Let’s ride….. 😂
Danny,
I just read (I got sidetracked by the link to your shotgun article) your "Fan fiction: Pete Carroll's 'Mole' undoes…" post.
It's hilarious. :)
It also had information that I was unaware of, and you provided links. My favorite link showed the lifted (heh) urban assault pickup for a short (for an NFL quarterback) person (5' 10 5/8" before age-related shrinkage).
Danny,
I clicked on the link that you posted for your "My Father’s Gun: Coming to Terms With a Controversial Weapon" column in Seattle Magazine, then I read the entire column. Then I re-read your Author's note for this Substack article/post: "Do not continue if you’re looking for anything that resembles journalism or you lack a sense of humor."
I decided that I did not fit the criteria for not continuing.
I liked your "My Father's Gun" Seattle Magazine column. You seem to be ambivalent (or at least the article gave me that impression) regarding guns. At the risk of being perceived as banging a drum: the first amendment to our republic of states' Constitution regards freedom of speech, and the second amendment regards gun rights. Please consider the significance of the juxtaposition of those first two amendments.
I hope that the following observations/memories (I grew up hunting/fishing) will help to provide more background/context regarding your father (not your stepfather).
1) BB guns can do significant property damage (windows) and even lifelong physical damage ("That'll put your eye out!").
2) BB guns are difficult for parents to monitor/supervise because they are quiet, inexpensive, and the ammunition (a BB) is so inexpensive as to be almost free.
3) As far as I know, geese hunting is done using 10 gauge or even 8 gauge shotguns because geese are flying at higher altitudes than ducks when hunted (I don't know why). A 12 gauge shotgun would have too much recoil for most 13 year old boys. A 10 gauge (the next larger bore) shotgun would have a more punishing recoil than a 12 gauge shotgun, and an 8 gauge shotgun has a larger bore (and more punishing recoil) than a 10 gauge shotgun.
You had me at "I like mine well done coach".
I about pissed myself. Brilliant Danny!
😂
Well done sir, well done.
This is AWESOME, hilarious. Also, joining the “conspiracy fiction” party a bit...what if this is your “Pelican Brief”?
Beware, Danny. The NFLPA Mafia might be coming for you soon.